Cargo shorts: they're a staple of summer. From frat boys to farmers, everyone loves the casual utilitarian style only cargo shorts can provide. So you'd think that by now, someone would have perfected their design. But as far as I have been able to tell, no one ever has. I'm not a clothing designer, but I am highly opinionated, and I do have legs—so I feel qualified to write about this topic. Here is how some designer could create the perfect cargo short; I offer this free of charge as a service to society.
Cargo Pockets
The heart and soul of the cargo short are its cargo pockets, obviously. The ideal pocket should be roomy but not bulky, secure but easily accessible. Most often it is the issue of accessibility that clothiers muck up. Repeat after me: buttons are a bad idea. If it takes two hands to open, you've failed. My first choice would be velcro, but snaps are also acceptable. Either way, you'll want two anchor points (rather than one in the center of the pocket flap) for added security.
Belt Loops
It's casual summer attire, so you probably aren't going to want a belt, but you still need to have belt loops. Why? Because it's also utility attire, so you ought to be able to clip in your keys. And since you're going to sew some belt loops on them, you might as well make the loops wide enough to fit a belt through. You know, on the off chance someone wants to go d-bag casual and slap a belt on. Bonus points here for a drawstring on the inside of the shorts.
Fit
Crotch: Tight-crotched low-rise jeans are one thing; I guess they're okay, if you are the type of guy who wants to go troll for the type of girl who likes guys who dress like women. But again: cargo shorts are casual wear—they should fit loosely and comfortably.
Length: Here's a simple rule: make the legs long enough so I don't look like a geometry teacher in line for Space Mountain. The hem of the shorts ought to flirt with the top of the knees, okay?
Front Pockets
Loose and deep. Not only should you be able to fit your hands in comfortably, but you ought to be able to hop in the car without fear of dropping all your change down into driver's seat no-man's-land.
Rear Pockets
These are a bonus feature. You're probably sticking your wallet in one of the cargo pockets, but sometimes you'll want a place to keep a napkin while you eat ice cream, or a place to stow your keys so they don't jangle so much (remember, they're on your belt loop). So repeat after me again: buttons are a bad idea. They're an even worse idea on the back than on the sides, because they're even more impossible to access. Matter of fact, let's get rid of the flaps altogether on the back pockets. Okay? Good.
Well, there you have it, clothing designers: the perfect cargo shorts. I'm not sure why this should be so hard, but now that I've spelled it out for you, can you get to work on it for me?
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6 comments:
d-bag casual huh? haha!
In full agreement with you. Thank you for offering this tidbit of user feedback to the fashion design world. A few comments from a fellow cargo wearer.
First, I'm not big on the velcro idea. I don't like the action of opening my cargo pockets to be made known to everyone in a 50 ft radius (ie: movie theatre). Its the same issue as a velcro wallet. Its just too noisy to be a good security measure. In addition to your recommendation of snaps, zippers could be a possible alternative. While not as stylish as the snaps - they are definitely more secure. The zippers can be hidden by a small flap to hide the potential "ugliness" of them.
Second, rear pockets should have easy access for wallet retrieval. I rarely throw a wallet in the side cargo pockets (mainly in fear of it falling out). Therefore, no buttons or snaps or flaps should be present in rear pocket situations. It makes the time to get through checkout much longer.
Third, and lastly, I usually prefer the short length to fall to the mid knee level, allowing the shorts an adequate length when sitting down. Top of the knee is usually fine - but an inch more length goes a long way in my opinion.
Overall a great assessment on the perfectly designed cargo short. Very essential for the 4.5 months out of the year that we use them.
Cargo shorts need to have pockets big enough to at least fit a paperback novel or a volume of poetry. What else says summer? What is up with those cargo shorts that have about eight to ten tiny pockets that are each only big enough to hold a pencil, a jackknife, coins, or flint? If you can barely put two fingers in it, than what's the point?
I have one pair of perfect cargo shorts. They are from GAP and I bought them 12 or so years ago. They are grey and awesome. perfect length, perfect pockets, two snaps on said cargo pockets and the single back pocket for perfection.
However, had I known that searching for good cargo shorts would consume so much time I would have purchased 47 pairs, but alas...I must enjoy my one pair.
One thing I might add is that washing and drying affect cargo shape. Some shorts are great until the 10th washing...some aren't great until the 10th washing.
And I am definately a wallet in the cargo pocket guy...as well as the cell phone.
I'm not really a cargo short wearer, but I am a cargo short washer and folder, so I would like to add that the ginormous pleat added to the side cargo pockets is usually overkill and requires an extra 20 minutes in the dryer for the clothing to dry. (I admit, I should just put them on a clothesline, but still.) Honestly, if you have enough stuff to fill THOSE pockets, you're going to need a belt to keep the shorts from displaying ALL your goods, if you know what I mean.
"flirt with the top of the knees" is my phrase of the day. Thank you!
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