Reviewing "The Book of Basketball"

I've just completed Bill Simmons's 700+ page tome, plainly titled The Book of Basketball, and I thought it might be fun to review it.

But let's get something out of the way first. You need to know at the outset that nothing written in this book can be taken seriously in light of a footnote on page 555, in which Simmons lists his "Mount Rushmore" of fast-food restaurants: "Chik-fil-a, Subway, Panda Express, and Arby's. In-N-Out would have made it if their fries didn't suck."

Is he serious? Arby's? Taking the burger slot on Mount Rushmore ahead of In-N-Out? That Arby's? (Michael Bluth might say, "Her?") The place that sells sweaty roast beef sandwiches? The eatery whose signature condiment is named after a "horsey"?

I can't begin to describe how poor a decision this is. This is a restaurant that until very recently would give you five sandwiches for five dollars and be happy to get the five dollars. In-N-Out is an icon; Arby's is an also-ran. If you told me I had two options, with option one being paying $20 to eat a double-double Animal burger from In-N-Out and option two being you paying me $10 to eat any sandwich from Arby's, I would choose option one a hundred times out of a hundred.

Not only is Arby's not better than In-N-Out; it's not even better than McDonald's—which is third among national chains behind Wendy's and Burger King. In fact, Arby's isn't even better than Jack in the Box (a.k.a. "E. Coli in the Box") or Carl's Jr. I'd rather eat at Roy Rogers than at Arby's. I'm incredulous.

To put this in basketball terms, it would be like saying you'd rather have Juwan Howard than Tim Duncan. Worse: this would be like making an all-time starting five and choosing Shawn Bradley as your center. Arby's is a one-tool player, only the one tool is winning jump balls (curly fries). Sure, that's great, no one's arguing your'e the best at that, but you're not winning games that way. In-N-Out could never win a jump ball (their fries are marginally disappointing), but they're scoring 45 a game in the playoffs.

Actually, you know what? I'm not even going to review the rest of the book, which I enjoyed, because that footnote was so disconcerting.

That's more like it

"It was a dud, plain and simple. Better luck next time, assuming there is a next time."

—Me, in my concert review after seeing Phish at Darien Lake in August.

Well, there was a next time, and the luck was most definitely better. I saw Phish again on November 29, and it was possibly the best show I've ever been to. This one was in Syracuse at the War Memorial at Oncenter, a minor league hockey rink with only 6,700 seats. It was by by far the smallest venue I've ever seen Phish in, and the intensity was off the charts. The band was super tight, the light show (aided by the small room with a shiny roof) was superb, and the setlist was relentless. Phish's "From the Road" entry has the setlist and several photos.

My main criticism after the Darien show was that the mix was terrible: Trey's guitar was piercingly loud, the drums were inconsistently present, and the keys were either EQed poorly or lacking altogether. The mix in Syracuse was spot-on. I could hear everything really well, and even when Trey stacked his overdrives and hit his wah, it was just loud—not painful. As a bonus, Page was using the Hammond a TON, which gave it a very Rift-era feel.

My other problem in August was that the band never seemed to get into a groove, and again, the Syracuse show was the polar opposite. The first set in particular seemed to go on forever, like they were having so much fun that they didn't want to stop. And they stayed tight right up until the very end, when they came out and kicked Zeppelin's "Good Times Bad Times" right in the teeth. All in all, a great night—the most fun I've had in ages.

Here's to a nice long run with Phish 3.0!

Flannel

We're in the middle of a really great series at Artisan Church. It's called "Flannelgraph: The Old Testament Story, Less Fuzzy," and we're making a new gigantic 4'x8' flannelgraph board each week. (Details here.) Now if you don't know what a flannelgraph is, well, God bless you. But if you grew up in the church as I did, this fuzzy didactic tool needs no introduction; you have plenty of memories—fond or otherwise—of your Sunday School teacher using it to imprint the stories and characters of the Bible into your brain. And it probably worked!

To an extent.

Because if you are anything like me, you may have ended up with a fairly strong knowledge of the stories, but not much understanding of the narrative. I often joke that when I was a kid, I just assumed that Abraham lived down the street from Peter and James, and sometimes they'd get together with Noah and Jesus, who brought Zaccheus to dinner once in a while. Like some biblical Sesame Street.

So it's somewhat ironic that one of the purposes of this Flannelgraph series is to give our people a better knowledge of the entire Old Testament story. In four weeks, we are telling the whole story, from creation through the divided kingdom and exile of Israel—all in preparation for the season of Advent, which begins on the final Sunday of the Flannelgraph series.

Because it's not okay for people of faith to be ignorant of their own story.

Meanwhile, Abel has really been into it, and we've made it a school project to make his own flannelgraph. Not one with biblical characters, at least not yet. Just little felt people playing baseball under a sky that is alternately sunny and cloudy. We've even talked about making flannelgraphs for his cousins for Christmas, which would be awesome low-cost "relational gifts."

So if you're in Rochester, it's not too late to get in on the story: come and join us for the final two weeks of the series. And if you're not, maybe consider building your own flannelgraph. It's easy and affordable; all you need is felt and some glue. It's a great way to help kids and grown-ups alike get creative and immerse themselves in the stories that matter.

Just don't forget about the narrative.



Edited to add: Those wavy lines in the ground on the right? They're totally quicksand.

More fun with CameraBag

I should probably write down the filters I use, but I never remember to. Here are two more subjects, each with two different filters, and the original version (shot with my Canon Rebel XT and a 50mm f/1.8 prime lens) at the end. You can click to enlarge the images.

Stacie and Dante:







Anna and Elliot:

CameraBag follows Tweetie to the desktop

One angle that is rarely mentioned in the debates about the App Store is the potential for developers of popular iPhone apps to go cross-platform and create an additional revenue stream with more expensive desktop versions. The most obvious example is Tweetie, a wildly successful Twitter application that debuted on the iPhone with a price of $2.99 and soon appeared on the desktop as well, where users have a choice of paying $19.95 or using a "free" ad-supported version.

The latest developer to wade into the desktop waters is NeverCenter, makers of the useful photo-filter app CameraBag. CameraBag, which taps into the iPhone's camera function and offers users a choice of filters designed to mimic the results of popular vintage film cameras, sells for $1.99 on the App Store. But the recently-released desktop version costs $19.

Unlike the desktop version of Tweetie, however, CameraBag for Mac offers significantly greater functionality and usability than its iPhone counterpart. In addition to a vastly larger display on which to view and edit your photos, the desktop version allows for quicker application and layering of filters, simple drop-menus for adjusting the borders, cropping, and output size, as well a "reprocess" feature that allows for nearly endless tinkering and fine-tuning. The Mac version of CameraBag really shines, and I was happy to fork over $20 for it. In contrast, I've only ever used the ad-supported version of Tweetie for Mac.

In a sense, the inexpensive iPhone version of CameraBag served as a very effective demo for the more lucrative Mac version. This move from mobile to desktop software is clearly more suited to some apps than others, but it should be interesting to see how this trend develops as the App Store grows in popularity and reach.

Here are a few photos I edited using CameraBag for Mac. (I posted some photos from the iPhone version in the previous post.)

iPhone photography

Lately I've been inspired by Chase Jarvis's photography motto, "The best camera is the one that is with you." Today I was on a walk with my family, and I felt like taking a few photos with my iPhone. I used the CameraBag iPhone application to apply some filters to the shots. I ended up getting a few good ones.

Tips on driving in Ireland

Driving in Ireland can be stressful. Trust me, I just got back. There's not really any way to avoid the stress, but it is worth it: when you drive, you control your own destinations and timetables, and you can see plenty of the magnificent countryside in just a week or ten days. Here are a few tips to make your life easier.

1. Use a GPS. Just trust me on this, okay? Here's what a street sign looks like in Dublin:






See anything? Neither did I. But if you have GPS, it doesn't matter, because it will tell you where to turn with a nice visualization of the street layout as your go. In actuality, about every fifth street in Dublin is marked with a sign, but they're small, low contrast affairs that are screwed into the sides of the buildings on the corner. And if you plan to travel the country roads (for example, on your way to your B&Bs), you're completely out of luck.

I can't stress it enough: get the GPS. You can add it on to your rental package for about €10/day, but a much cheaper solution is to purchase the Ireland maps for the GPS already own. For my Garmin GPS, the SD card cost me $80 used on eBay, and I intend to recoup almost 100% of that cost by reselling it.

2. Tight to the left, wide to the right. Repeat this mantra every time you turn. Once you're driving straight ahead, it's easier to manage, but those turns are real nailbiters. Remember "tight left, wide right" and you'll avoid ending up on the wrong side of the street staring down an oncoming farm tractor.

3. It's not just about which lane you're in. Other things to consider: You merge onto highways to your right. Slower traffic keeps to the left, and you pass on the right. You pull over to the left when you want to look at your travel book or let someone by. You must yield to oncoming traffic when turning right, but you needn't bother when turning left.

And perhaps most importantly, your body is on the right side of the vehicle. This matters—a lot—when you are traveling on Ireland's famous narrow country roads. Your instinct will be that the entire width of the car is to your right and that it will be clipped by oncoming traffic, so you'll pull way over to the left and scratch your passenger door on the enormous thorn bushes. You can get a lot closer than is comfortable and still not get hit by that Beamer rushing toward you.

4. Roundabouts. Oh, the roundabouts. They're everywhere in Ireland. Once you get used to them, you'll wonder why they're not everywhere in the US, too—they sure beat waiting at red lights. The trick is simply to remember that when you're entering the roundabout, you must yield to the traffic that's already in it. The GPS comes in handy here as well, because it tells you which exit to take once you're in. The best part about the roundabouts is if you're unsure about which way to go, you can drive around and around and around as many times as it takes to decide. Just don't get too dizzy, or you'll forget tip #2.

5. Remember the people are Irish. It's not the Bronx. They're nice. There is almost no road rage on the Emerald Isle; I think I heard one horn in the ten days we were there. Don't worry that someone is going to scream at you if you make a mistake. Unless it's your spouse.

But if I had any tips to help you with that, I'd be rich.